Start thinking about what you would like to change and not what you want to change in others.
My name is Hema Nanuwa. I was born and raised in Nairobi, Kenya and now am settled in Leicester UK, with my lovely family. I have three incredible children, a stepson, a daughter and a son. I realised that I wanted to be at home with my daughter as much as possible and therefore I decided to go back to work part time, best decision I ever made. Meanwhile we also experienced a lot of hurdles with my husband’s family and we decided in 2019 to invest in a transformation coach to have a positive impact on our lives…. He has been a blessing to our family, with his wealth of knowledge, guidance and spirituality. He has allowed us to thrive in our lives and for me to focus on one of my greatest dreams in life of owning my own business and writing a book about my journey – Seeing my business through will be amazing. Always dreaming and hoping and little did I know I will end up as a transformation coach to share my journey with all the women out there…
My purpose is to share what I have learnt from my life’s journey and my transformational coach to other women in similar situations as me and transform their lives in ways beyond what they ever imagined. My focus is on adding value to women, covering topics close to my heart ie. marriage, moving countries, in-laws, motherhood, etc…
I am a people person and my ambitions are to make a difference in womens’ lives in a positive way. From my own journey I have learnt ways in which to make myself a better person, I want to share this with all. It has been a bumpy journey that brought back the good and bad that happened in my life, but I can assure you that once you start your own journey with my guidance the outcome is a miracle, which one can only express once they go through this amazing journey. There are loads of challenges along the way which together we will overcome. I want to help you to make changes in your life through what my journey has shown me, messy to miracles. I have started my journey with 1:1 personalised sessions, which I hope will move on in the future to group talks and one day possibly publish a book.
My mission is all about sharing my experience as an Indian daughter, wife and mother and coaching individuals and groups to better themselves, connecting to one’s super mind. I invite you to join me on this journey as we discover together how to overcome hurdles and feel great about being YOU. Always remember that your present situation is not your final destination, the best is yet to come. Your comments are most welcome, and I thank you for reading.
Why come to me?
Why come to me??? Must be a question that runs through your mind…. My passion is to make a difference in womens’ lives, and I have found the perfect way to do this is by relating it to my very own journey. Come see me and I can show you how one’s negative experiences can be ones most powerful teachers. Start thinking about what you would like to change and not what you want to change in others, and I will guide you through this amazing journey.
I was blessed to have the most amazing parents a girl could ask for when my soul chose them as my parents. They have always shown me the right way and ensured I grow up to be a respectful, caring and loving woman. I was given all the freedom and I never took advantage of this. My parents are my best friends and I share all my happiness and sadness with them. They have always been a pillar of strength and support, and are always there for me. They have always supported me with all the decisions I have made in life and guided me in the right way. They have always allowed me to pursue my dreams and become successful. They taught me to live life like I want it and never look back, if I need a helping hand, I know they will always be here for me. The day my parents told me ‘you have grown up and become a mother yourself, but you will always be our daughter and we will always love you like nobody else’. They truly mean the world to me and words cannot express how grateful I am to my parents, love you mum & dad.
I am blessed to have 2 siblings, 1 sister and 1 brother. We have a very strong bond, but we all have very different personalities even if we have been brought up with the same values and ethics. My sister is the perfect daughter who has always been the ray of sunshine for our family. We have always been there for each other over the years and I hope this will never change, especially as we now have our own families to look after.
Being a sister to them has been the best experience I have had and has allowed me to indirectly practice my coaching and mentoring skills, they have been my guinea pigs from when we were young. From an early age being a big sister taught me to be patient, understanding, compassionate and loving. I would do absolutely anything for them both, regardless of situation and scenario and I would drop everything in a heartbeat to ensure they are safe and sound. They taught me something new every day and allowed me to enhance my skills unknowingly. They make me so proud of them and they taught me how to be proud of myself for being their sister.
Becoming a wife was one of the best and hardest time of my life. I met my dream man and moved to UK, where I left my family behind in Kenya. I have been with my husband for a number of years and it has been one rollercoaster ride. We have never had a year without dramas except for in 2019 where I can officially say we are living our life the way we want, and nothing is going to get in our way. What we have been through has just made our love for each other stronger and made us realise nothing matters more than our immediate family, which is the four of us.
The main reasons why we are still going strong in our marriage is, honesty, trust and most of all compromises. Over time I realised I must accept my husband just as he is, if anything needs changing, it’s my mindset as no one is in charge of my happiness except myself. Over time and with the guidance I received I have become better at this.
Our goal as a couple is to keep our marriage relationship strong and raise our children and care for them with endless love and the right guidance. I have a mind of my own, but I have learnt to follow my husband’s lead on certain matters as he often sees things very differently. We submit to one another on many issues and typically reach to a compromise that works for both of us. Overtime I have learnt to appreciate his loving, protective reminder as the right guidance I need from time to time.
The additional responsibilities of marriage, being a good wife and a caring mother were never a burden on my shoulder because my husband was always there to support me. I love you my darling husband.
From my experience it is best to have a bit of distance from your in laws. Distance makes the heart grow fonder. I had a couple of great years living with my in laws and all was well but external factors changed things for the worst, I never imagined this, as my parents taught me great values and moulded me into being a great daughter in law. I did everything possible to be the perfect daughter in law but the close relationship I dreamt of didn’t evolve.
Over the period, I experienced many emotions of hurt, resentment, toxicity, etc…
Once I started accepting that the situation is the situation and there is nothing I could do to have the relationship that I dreamt of it soon reduced the impact to my life.
The key rule, dealing effectively with in laws all starts with first working conflicts through with your spouse, you are in this together. Never put your spouse in a situation where he must choose between you and a relative. Work to resolve the conflict.
Most importanty I learnt to love myself ‘I was acceptable’. This made a huge difference in my journey as now I was in a positive state of mind. As soon as you accept yourself as ‘acceptable’ from ‘not acceptable’ everything changes for the best.
I was super lucky that before my stepson found out I was going to get married to his dad, we got to bond with each other. We have a special bond that is more of a friendship as he already has his mum. He has brought so much to my life and each day he helps me reach beyond what I know, to see the world differently and to have to answer questions that sometimes are so hard. He is an incredible boy who is growing into a pretty awesome man – smart, funny and full of energy. He has taught me to accept, as he accepted me as part of his and his dad’s life. Our relationship is great because I strongly believe I never tried to replace his mum or stand in the way of her. I was the other person he could count on, trust and someone that he knows loves him no matter what. I am one lucky woman, I found him and his dad in my life. I really appreciate you and love you very much.
Words cannot express the feeling of becoming a mother! It was the best gift God had given me, and I am forever eternal for this. Becoming a mother expanded my parameters of what love looks like to me and opened a part of my heart that I didn’t know existed. This kind of love is entirely different than the love I had for my parents, spouse, etc… My daughter was special from the day she was born, as she was my reason in keeping going and making sure we stay as a family during a difficult period in our lives. Don’t get me wrong, motherhood comes with sleepless nights, tears and frustrations, but this is all forgotten when you get the endless love, cuddles, hugs and kisses from the bundle of joy.
The most important thing to realise is that you are not alone, all mothers experience the same process and you do get through it, trust me. I was lucky that my parents came to stay with me for 4 months and how grateful I am for their help and support especially as we had all the dramas with my husband’s family.
I realised you don’t have to be perfect and you can make mistakes along the way, we are human after all. Make sure you are not judgmental with yourself. This was the hardest for me, but I have learnt to slowly deal with this.
My Favourite quote that made me appreciate motherhood and thrive to do the best as a mother is ‘There’s no way to be a perfect mother but a million ways to be a good one’ Jill Churchill.
To sum it up, the day my daughter was born her tiny hands were holding my fingers and her eyes were sparkling and that day she gave my life a new purpose. She is my guiding light and I love her so much.
In my journey over the last one year I have learnt to love and respect myself. I have changed my mindset to thinking ‘I am ACCEPTABLE’ and the best is yet to come. I learnt if you keep giving, giving , giving and don’t do anything for yourself you will get resentful. There is nothing wrong from time to time thinking about yourself and treating yourself. I learnt to love myself, which made me much happier and taught me best to take care of myself. When you are truly in love with yourself and happy, you should stop comparing yourself to others so much and should find yourself more confident, not worrying as much about what others think. I learnt to reflect on life and my past and this helped me to forgive and forget.
I learnt how to express myself by writing my thoughts and feelings, and sometimes I used to go back and see how I coped with certain situations. Also, this was a positive way for me to get rid of any negative experience and feelings I had, helping me focus on the good in life and learning from the bad. I learnt to give myself a break from time to time, as we all need a break. Most of all I learnt to celebrate my achievements and gave myself credit that I deserved.
Every day I am learning new things about myself and I cannot wait to see where this amazing positive journey is going to take me.
Transformation Coaching Service
I want to empower my clients to transform their lives by developing their capabilities and set purposeful goals, while increasing their performance through learning, reaching and maintaining their full potential in an easier and faster way than if they acted alone. Through this transformation process my clients will take control of their future and set empowering goals which are positive and relevant in order to improve the quality of their lives.
One to One
My sessions are bespoke and are tailored to each individual need via face to face, Skype or telephone. The first session is to gauge if we are the right fit for each other/ this is a free session. If we are both happy to proceed, we will design our unique coaching relationship together. This is a chance for me to get to understand where you are in your life, what lights you up and what you struggle with. This also gives you a chance to hear about who I am and how I became a transformation coach.
Testimonials & Mentions
Hema has been a great coach that has helped me navigate emotions and challenges in a way that makes them manageable. I really like the way Hema was open about her own experiences and used real experiences to help me through my own issues. I also really appreciate the follow up which consisted to just checking in but also written information for me to refer back to. Thank you Hema for making a very tough journey much more palatable!
I highly recommend Hema as a transformational coach. She has helped tremendously so far in my life improvements. She has a wealth of knowledge and is able to give strong guidance to myself through her own personal experiences. She has hugely increased my confidence as a young woman, and is helping me deal with issues I have developed from my childhood. I recommend this service over counselling, as Hema helps deal with root causes and patterns of behaviors over surface level issues. I'd also like to note that Hema is a very kind, compassionate and motherly person. Which makes it easier to open up about any issues I am facing. Thank you x
Yes settled and at peace. Have learnt to accept things and am in a much better situation. Thanks for all your help.